Silence

It wasn't intentional, but my life in Honduras has seemed to revolve around numbers. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I always seem to be counting to see if we are all "here".


21: different beds that I have slept in during my time in Honduras.
32: weeks of my bible study at church
18: trips I took to immigration to ask permission to stay in the country
80: minutes driving between Tegucigalpa and the Villa
3: movies in the Narnia series that we have watch countless times
25: pounds in the bag of rice that we buy nearly every week
24: people that we fit in the 15-passenger van for a trip to La Tigra
73: blogs about my adventures

And now just one number remains...FOUR

FOUR
In exactly four weeks, I will be on a plane bound for Atlanta, GA. In four weeks (minus a day) I will be packing two years worth of life into two suitcases. In four weeks there will be tears, and hugs, and a chorus of "Miss Katie, don't go".

And I won't want to go. I will want to stay and continue to be a part of raising a dozen kids. I will want to be here for Kimberly's birthday in December and the beginning of the new school year in February.

But it's not about what I want.
God said "go"
and I went. Now He is calling me home.

"How long?" I ask at three o'clock in the morning when I am on my knees. And there is silence.
"Will I get to see the girls graduate?". And there is silence.
"Who will teach English without me?" And there is silence.
"What am I going to do in the States? Where should I live?" and there is silence.

Silence. Silence. Silence.
I have learned to accept God's silence. It is not because He is punishing me, but rather because He knows that it's not yet time for me to know. He keeps silent before my downpour of questions. He will give me the answers when I am ready and able to receive them. And some time in the future He will begin to answer my questions when I least expect.

Psalm 37:7 says "be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.". In Spanish, the same verse starts out "be silent before the Lord..."


Four weeks...

Four weeks to pack up my things, finish my bible study, say my goodbyes, find my "lost" items, and give the kids their English exams.
Four weeks to be silent before God, trusting in His next steps for my life.

Mama Bear

I know that I'm only 25 years old and that technically Haeyoung is the "mama" of the Villa, but in the past two years I have definitely taken on some "mama bear" qualities.

1. I am quick to defend my kids to others, even if they are saying the same thing that I was just complaining about the other day.
2. Call it a 6th sense but I always know where all 12 of them are and I seem to always know when they are about to get into trouble.
3. When we are in sketchy places, I definitely grow claws. They can tell by my face that I'm no-nonsense and they'd better not mess with me.
4. I become proud mama bear whenever our girls perform.

Let me explain that last one.

In August 2010, Angie came to the Villa and we discovered that she had a talent and a passion for dancing. So we channeled her dancing towards the other girls and BAM, we have a group of girls that worship God through dance. SO COOL.

First, they performed for Elvia's birthday celebration. The pastor was so touched, he invited them to share it with the whole congregation.

Then the girls choreographed some more songs and performed them at several outreaches in 4 different pueblos/cities.
A teacher at one of the major bilingual schools loved how the girls worshipped through dance and asked them to perform at her school in front of over 500 students.

And just this weekend the girls performed a drama in front of thousands of people at a city-wide outreach day. The girls rehearsed for hours every day and did a fantastic job when their time came.

I was able to watch them from the wings of the stage and was brought to tears. How beautiful are my girls. I am so proud to see how far God has brought them.

Our 7 girls came to us with major attitudes and a lot of emotional wounds that needed healing. Sara refused even a hug when she first arrived. Kimberly's first months were basically silent, and Paola used to break down in tears when she was addressed.

Then and now
A lot of stories could be told about how they were, but we focus on how they are now. I have grown to love these girls, my emotional bunch of teenage girls. They make me so proud. They love God and they serve Him.

God has brought them so far, and oh how far He will take them still!